Number 4 In the Family Series: My Husband's Perspective

(I love this pic of Dal...the badass in the hoodie.)

Here it is...the truth we are afraid to hear.  

For my teacher friends, these are the insights we are always afraid to ask for from our spouses:  what's it like to be married to a teacher?  What do they really think about our dedication to our kids and our job?

This is my husband's view of what I do.  

It greeted me this morning at the coffee maker.

My beloved is a brilliant writer - better than I am, I dare say, so I will stop here and let him "speak" for himself:

We have all had that one teacher.

That one who was phoning it in.

That one who picked on us & made us feel stupid.

That one who should have found another profession years ago but they were sticking it out for the vacation time, pension, sense of power, or some other reason that they would not admit.

We think about that teacher.

We colour our view of all educators in the same shade as that teacher.

We constantly believe that our children are in the presence of that teacher & they are doing to them what they did to us.

Just to let you know …

My wife is not that teacher.

My wife is a passionate & present person.

My wife draws in those who have been damaged by their home lives & the system to attempt to get them the counselling that they ought to have.

My wife fights against apathy, bureaucracy, wilful ignorance, & sometimes the children, themselves, to empower kids & their families with the schooling they so richly deserve.

She is on call for children & parents who wish to voice their concerns or air their grievances.

She has opened her home on weekends for students who have been so overcome by their lives that formal education is no longer a priority in an attempt to get them back into school.

She takes care of those who need it the most when others feel that they deserve it the least.

Do I think that she is a saint?

No.

I have watched her struggle over the years against administration, other teachers, students, & her own personal issues to the point where I thought she was, in plain terms, a masochist.

Plus, anyone who has heard her talk knows that she is no saint.

Do I think that she is infallible?

No.

Being fervent & loving can result in a feverish disposition; sometimes, less than tactful.  She owns her mistakes.

Do I think that she is right?

Yes.

In terms of a righteous fury, a justified warrior, she is the one you want on your side, fighting for you, struggling for your child.

I am a private man.

I was hesitant to write this article.

I enjoy the solitude of my home life & dislike strangers in my sphere.

I find there are times that her patience has been spent at school & there is little to give at home.

I wish there were periods she would disconnect from the turmoil of others to focus on the serenity within herself.

When I see the difference she makes in other people’s lives, I understand why she does what she does.

When I see how she gives people the opportunity to better themselves, I realize that the sacrifices that I must make in my home to accommodate her plan are, at best, minor.

When I see how she loves to help, I feel like I should do more.

Just to let you know …

My wife is not that teacher.

My wife is a teacher.